Wisdom From Lost's John Locke

I am a gigantic fan of Lost and recently I've started re-watching it from the first episode.

For all of you weirdos that have never seen it (I say that very lovingly of course), Lost is about a group of people who are plane-crashed on a mysterious Island. All of the survivors are damaged human beings, they all have complicated and rich histories, they all have secrets and struggles. They all have things that they are ashamed of, and by the end of the series, each and every one of them comes into their own, embraces who they really are, and they all realize that they are stronger than their pasts.

I was watching an episode a few days ago and I fell in love with a certain concept. You see, when I first watched Lost years ago, it was before my "big change", before I realized all of the things that I hated about myself were fixable, before I realized I had the power to change. This time around while watching it, my heart just went "Yesyesyes" at this part of the episode.

The exchange takes place between John Locke, a man who knows all about suffering. Before the plane crash he was in a wheelchair, paralyzed from the waist down. He was constantly told that he couldn't do anything. After the plane crash he wakes up on the Island and he can walk again. Charlie, another survivor, is a washed up Rock Star who also happens to be addicted to heroin, cue troubled times for Charlie.

Locke realizes what's going on with Charlie and asks Charlie to give him the last of his heroin, which Charlie does. The next few days are a struggle for Charlie, he starts going through withdrawals, he starts doubting his worth on the Island, he starts thinking about the past and the things that validate his feelings of worthlessness.

He asks Locke for the drugs back and Locke tells him no, but if he asks two more times he can have them. This takes place in the jungle on the second time.

Locke: What do you suppose is in that cocoon, Charlie?
Charlie: I don't know. A - a - a butterfly, I guess.
Locke: No, it's much more beautiful than that. That's a moth cocoon. It's ironic - butterflies get all the attention, but moths, they spin silk. They're stronger. They're faster.
Charlie: That's wonderful, but...
Locke: You see this little hole? This moth's just about to emerge. It's in there right now, struggling. It's digging it's way through the thick hide of the cocoon. Now, I could help it - take my knife, gently widen the opening, and the moth would be free - but it would be too weak to survive. Struggle is nature's way of strengthening it. Now this is the second time you've asked me for your drugs back... ask me again, and it's yours. 

Gotta love that right? I realized how true that was and it made me giddy that I could fully understand. Without my struggles I wouldn't be who I am today. If someone would have just come along and fixed all of my problems (like I wished so very many times that they would) then this Dominee right here, writing about all of the stuff that this Dominee writes about, wouldn't exist.

Every struggle that you go through makes you stronger. 

You might wish with every fiber of your being that someone was there to stop the suffering (most times that only person that can stop it is you) but surviving it makes you stronger. It makes you more prepared to face the next struggle. Even if you don't see it now, or a year from now, or five years from now, doesn't mean it's not buried under there somewhere. So often we hide our struggles behind layers of shame, fear, and guilt and that stops us from seeing the strength and the other gifts that come out of those situations.

To stand up and say, "This is what I went through. This is what I learned. Now I am stronger." Is one of the greatest gifts of wisdom you can give yourself. Share your story. When you share your struggles and what you've learned from them, then you empower others to do the same.

What struggles have strengthened you? What struggles do you still feel shame and guilt about? Can you look deep within yourself and find any gifts that came from that?

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Into the street the Piper stept smiling first a little smile..

Hello shiny sparkly soul!

Today's card that I pulled for me + you (what a completely awesome combination) is the Piper from Brian Froud's The Faeries' Oracle.

I love this card because I've been thinking about and talking about a lot of what this card represents. I really want to start sharing my love of music. Music can be so transformational and has had a lot to do with my journey and where I've been. During my darkest moments of the parts of me shifting, colliding, fragmenting, and coming together, music helped me make sense of it. Definitely a post for another day!

I've also been thinking about my tribe. You see, my entire life I have wanted nothing more than to fit in and be a part of something. In high school I tried the school newspaper and Writer's Club, both of which I dropped out of. I practiced Wicca but never found any like-minded people to connect with in person so I gave up. The Goddess Circle was my first foray into fitting in and it felt good. I've begun to realize that I don't have to seek that out any more. It comes to me, and that's a pretty awesome thing to realize.

The Piper drifts through our lives allowing us to communicate from the heart without the use of words. Through music you can convey emotions to one another and allow someone else to hear what's in your heart without saying a thing. The Piper's approach is gentle and wordless, he plays for us with the whispers of leaves, birdsong, the rustle of grass, and the whirring of the computer. Listen to the world around you.

The Piper teaches us that when we want something we should try to be polite and gentle in our approach, use your skills of persuasion and then wait for it to come to you. Embody what you want in life and allow it to make its way to you. It's a Law of Attraction kinda thang.

What things do you want to draw to you? What are you waiting to manifest in your life? What sort of Piper are you?

P.S. If you are interested in getting your cards read I do Oracle Card Readings. Feel free to email me at Dominee@BlessingManifesting.com if you have any questions and want to know more!

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Giving Your God Some Lovin's

Happy Magic Monday you lovely yous!

I'm not uber open about my spiritual practices, mainly because talking about it is quite new to me and I'm always afraid that people are gonna give me the raised eyebrow and omgyouaresoweird look, but then again I get that anyway so who cares, right?

One of the things that have really enhanced my spiritual practice are daily devotions. Daily devotions are acts of prayer or worship that are done... well... daily. :)

In past posts I've referenced how relationships with Deity are not all that different from relationships with other people. My spiritual path is pretty eclectic. I have bonds with several Gods and I feel distinct personalities from each of them. How I worship them is based on those personalities. My Gods are really like people to me.

For instance Aphrodite, Greek Goddess of love, beauty, sensuality, likes attention. She likes to be pampered and shown affection. She's that friend that wants you to call her every day to chat, she wants to hang out, and in return she'll be there for you when you need her and even when you don't.

When I first started worshiping Aphrodite in earnest, I created a small altar to her, which you can see above. A lovely statue, seashells, and stones related to her. Every day I lit a candle for her and burned incense in her name. At the start of every week I bought her half a dozen roses to adorn her space and I'd later use the dried petals for various things.

That was the honeymoon phase so to speak, full of wooing and tokens of the affection. That was about three or four years ago and now we've settled into a comfortable relationship. A few weeks ago I was thinking about my daily practice and how I miss it. I still "talk" to Aphrodite on a daily basis, before I go to sleep usually, or at random parts of my day, but it's become an unintentional thing. I wanted to bring intention back into my practice.

This last week and a half of spending time at my altar for her and lighting a candle, has had an amazing effect on me. It really gives me time to check in with myself and with Aphrodite. It feels good to have a daily practice again.

It fills up my heart in such of a full, beautiful, way.

Happy heart and happy spirit.

Do you have a daily practice as far as your religion or spirituality goes? How does that effect your life? If you don't have a daily practice try starting one!

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The Council of Elrond aka You Know What To Do

So allow me to geek-out for a minute. Lord of the Rings is the most awesome movie trilogy ever made. If you don't agree, it's a'ight I still loves you.

This here picture relates to this post because today we're talking about how awesomely WISE you are and how you need to seek your own council. Ya see, in the Lord of the Rings a council is convened to figure out what to do with the One Ring, a ring that has amazing power.

As everyone is fighting and arguing over what to do, Frodo Baggins steps forward, surprising himself and everyone else, and offers to take the ring to be destroyed. He knew what needed to be done and resolved to do it.

Last week I was having a lot of issues with work and I got lots of advice. Lots of wonderful, loving, (sometimes negative), advice on what I should do. It was all well-meaning and appreciated but I began to feel a bit overwhelmed.

I realized that while advice is sometimes helpful, and can open up new thought process, or allow your own thoughts to feel validated, the important part of any situation is listening to yourself and your intuition. You know what you need to do, about anything and everything!

You may feel confused, shy, wary, unsure, and uncertain but the bottom line is that you know the answers. You know what is right for you. Seek your own council. Be still and quiet and wait for your inner wise-woman(person) to point you in the right direction. You don't need anyone to make your decisions for you or to tell you what to do.

Your heart knows.

Your soul knows.

So stand up bravely and announce that you know your way, you know the path you need to take. (Hopefully it doesn't involve a trek to Mordor with a deranged, ring-obsessed, lunatic)

Form a bond of trust with yourself and your decisions. This can be difficult, I know. The more you begin to rely on your intuition the more you will trust your own feelings and your own decisions. This is a cornerstone of self love. To love thyself is to know thyself and vice-versa.

Remember to embrace your own wisdom, your own power, and your own ability to change your life in positive and meaningful ways.

"Not all who wander are lost." - J.J.R. Tolkien

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The Lady of Shalott

Hello there m'dears!

Lately I've been digging into my musical history and falling in love with songs all over again. If you follow me on Facebook you've probably noticed a bit of Celtic Woman popping up (Because they are AWESOME).

While I was digging though my music I found one of my most favorite songs ever and I've been listening to it a lot lately. The Lady of Shalott by Loreena McKennitt.

I have loved the story of the Lady of Shalott ever since I read the poem by Alfred Tennyson. The poem is about a woman who is mysteriously cursed. She lives in a tower and must continually weave images on her loom without ever looking directly out at the world. Instead, she looks into a mirror which reflects the busy road and the people of Camelot which pass by her island.

At first she delights in her weaving, but as she begins to see life unfolding in front of her she starts to become discontent at life passing her by. There comes a day when she sees the image of Sir Lancelot in a field below and that is it for her. She falls in love. She makes the decision to look out the window and cast her eyes on him. As she does that her mirror cracks and she knows that the curse has come upon her.

Instead of waiting in her tower for her fate to befall her, she rushes from the tower and finds a boat. She climbs in and allows herself to float down to Camelot. For just that moment she has true freedom. By the time she reaches Camelot and Lancelot finds her boat, she has died. "But Lancelot mused a little space; He said, "She has a lovely face; God in his mercy lend her grace, The Lady of Shalott".

The reason I always loved this poem was because I felt like I was her. I was trapped in a tower of my own making, I didn't allow myself to connect to the real world and I was content that way. I was waiting for that one moment to come along where everything would change and I would no longer be content to stay in my tower and watch the world pass me by.

That moment came for me. I stopped existing and I started participating and it feels good. The Lady of Shalott didn't have a happy ending in the traditional sense, but I think her descent down the river, surrounded by the real world, was perferable to a life spent up in a tower, wasting away. Sometimes we have to take a chance!

What chances are you taking right now? When was a time when you stepped out of your tower and embraced life? I'd also love to hear about what songs and poems inspire you!

Have an awesome day!

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Grumpy-Pants No More

This last week has seen me being bad-tempered, cantankerous, crabby, cross, crotchety, disgruntled, dissatisfied, griping, grouchy, grumbling, irritable, peevish, pettish, petulant, querulous, sulky, sullen, surly, testy, truculent (thank you thesaurus) which I sum up into one hyphenated word: Grumpy-Pants.

Now grumpy-pants is pretty self explanatory but what it means is that you are metaphorically wearing these gigantic, ill-fitting, drab colored, pants that just scream "Leave me the 'eff alone or I might bite your face off."

Not very comfortable and definitely scary. Scary, scary, pants.

I had a bad night at the pays-the-bills-job, and then another, and another and it completely drained me. I was in such a sour mood that even thinking positive didn't help. My foul mood was so bad that I stepped away from Blessing Manifesting for a few days so as not to drench you with my rainy day(s).

This morning (or evening for those of you that have normal sleeping hours) I woke up and found myself feeling a bit cheerier, a bit back to my normal self. When I checked my e-mail I found a lovely e-mail from one of my Sacred Journey Through Journaling participants telling me how helpful the prompts had been to her. It was lovely and totally a rainbow through the remaining clouds.

My happy-pants appeared and I put on my Blessing Manifesting tiara (because... I mean... it's a tiara! Part of the official Blessing Manifesting uniform dontcha know?) and I decided to pull a card for me+you this week from the Oracle of the Dragonfae and it was instant LOVE. Lady Titania: Be Joyful.

Lady Titania tells us to celebrate ourselves. There is no true happiness without joy in being who you are. It is time to play, revel, and dance in the moonlight. It is time to emerge from taking shelter and quiet time and partake in joy and the company of loved ones. Delight and celebrate everything!

Just as you are feeling old, despairing, and fatigued, she will sweep you into her strong arms and show you the treasures in your life. Being lonely and isolated is no longer an option for you!

True story! Let's all find something to be joyful about and let that bring us together. Today I am joyful about a cool summer, the fresh air and the breeze coming through the window, and the absolute goddess-like beauty of my body.

What are you finding joy in today?

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Self Love doesn't equal Selfishness.

“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.”― Oscar Wilde

One of the misconceptions about self love is that it is a selfish act. To which I say Hells No! Selfishness is defined as:

Devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others.

Now, I'm all for you being devoted to you, and of course you should be concerned with your own interests, but true selfishness is usually born out of ego and out of a complete lack of regard for other people. Taking the time and the space for yourself is rarely going to cause other people injury or harm.

When you make the space to love yourself, you make more space to love others. 

I wish I could put into words how much truly loving myself has allowed me to love others. Before I started this journey, loving someone wasn't about them, it was about me. What they could do for me, how they could make me feel better about myself. I loved people, not for who they were, but for whether or not they could temporarily chase away my self-loathing, my insecurities, and my pain.

I loved them for who I wanted them to be, not for who they were. As long as I got attention to soothe my fragile ego and the un-loved-ness parts of myself, I didn't care about anything else.

Now that I actually feel good about myself, a lot of my relationships have changed for the better, there have been huge shifts... growing pains... but each of them have come out the other side better and stronger than they were before. I have learned to value people by who they are, not by what they give my ego. My self love practices have really changed me in so many ways. I can finally love unconditionally.

Ain't nothin' selfish about that!

So, what I am trying to get across is get thee to loving thyself. It is not only a gift that you give to yourself, but one that you give to the world.

Have you ever felt guilty or selfish for taking time for you? How has self love changed your relationships with those around you?

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Back to Boundaries

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about boundaries and Kim's post yesterday brought those thoughts even more to the forefront of my mind. A lot of tests to my boundaries have been taking place lately and ohmyfreakin'goodness do I have trouble with it.

I am a reform(ing)ed people-pleaser. 

I like making other people happy at the expense of my own happiness. I like saying what other people want to hear. It's hard for me to say no and it's hard for me to argue. (I'm getting better, I swear!)

One of the worst instances of this happened about seven years ago. I filed a sexual harassment complaint against someone I worked with. I was twenty at the time and he was probably in his fifties. He never really talked to anyone and he always gave me a creepy vibe. He was constantly invading my space. Getting way too close to me, and when he brushed pass me several times with his groin brushing my butt it became something that was completely unacceptable.

I went to management about it and then had to meet with a female manager that I didn't know. I told her about the situation and then she asked me some questions like:
"Well you're a very friendly person maybe he was just trying to be your friend."
To which I replied with an "No."
"So you don't think he's just shy and trying to find a way to talk to you?"
To which I replied with an uncertain, "Well I don't think so..."
The questions kept coming and making me feel like I was wrong and that I wasn't saying the "right" thing so eventually I relented and agreed that maybe he was just trying to be my friend.

Trying to be my friend by inappropriately touching me. Yeah. That made sense.

That moment still haunts me because I gave up my power to someone else and I still haven't forgiven myself for it. It still makes me furious that I did that. It makes me sad that I didn't have enough faith and confidence to say that it was wrong and stick to that. A few days later I talked to someone else about it, stood my ground, and the guy was fired, but I was still stuck on the fact that if my friends and family hadn't pushed me to do that, I would've let him get away with it.

Right now I am finding my boundaries challenged in less traumatic ways. Whenever I come across resistance with my boundaries I think of how I felt after that day and I realize that the cost of sticking up for my boundaries is way less than the cost to cave in.

If I would have stuck up for myself it would have made me feel uncomfortable in the moment, it would have made me feel anxious to disagree with someone that intimidated me, but I guarantee you I wouldn't still be torn up about it seven years later.

Sticking up for your boundaries probably isn't going to be fun in the moment, it may even make you feel terrible and like a horrible person, but when you embrace your power to say no, to say this is how I deserve to be treated, to say that what someone is doing to you is not okay, you create a better future for yourself.

Embrace your power to control how the story ends. [[Click to tweet!]]

It's hard, it sucks, especially when you feel like you're the only person fighting for you. It gets easier. The more you stick up for yourself the easier it is to realize that you're worth it. That you matter and so do you boundaries. Don't let people make you uncomfortable. Don't relinquish your power because you are too scared to use it. Know that you are worth the time, the effort, and the energy of standing up for yourself.

Don't let others take advantage of your love, your body, your time, or your energy. You don't have to put up with it. Even if you've let people push past your boundaries before that doesn't mean you have to keep letting it happen. At any time you have permission to stop it. Let today be the day that you enforce your boundaries. Let today be the day you choose you.

How do you deal with people encroaching on your boundaries? How do you feel after sticking up for yourself? What happens when you allow someone to invade your boundaries?

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Sacred Journey Through Journaling: Kim

Last week I mentioned how I would love for you lovely people to send me your responses to the prompts in Sacred Journey Through Journaling e-course.

Blessing Manifesting isn't just about my voice and my story, it's about yours as well. I want to encourage you to share your words and your wisdom. If there's one thing I want you to always remember, it's that your story matters.
Today I share with you the words and story of Kim.

How are your boundaries in regards to other people? Do you find that you are more likely to let people in or keep people out? When people push your boundaries how do you react?

My boundaries with friends and acquaintances are sadly lacking sometimes.  Part of it was the way I was brought up, but to an extreme.  I was brought up to not make waves, especially in public and outside of family.  "Always present a pleasant face."  While I am all about manners and such, and totally against unnecessary harshness or rudeness, there is a fine line between maintaining civility and allowing yourself to be treated like crap.  And all too often I have let people cross that line.  Most of the time, I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and I internalize it.  Or complain to my husband about it!  But it is draining.  It drains the creativity, the trust, and the faith in people right out of you.  And it sucks.  

I never used to be a big doormat, but I think life in general over the past several years has drained me to the point that sometimes it just doesn't feel as if the effort is worth it.  Sometimes the resulting drama is worse than just dealing with the lack of boundaries from others.  But I have had a few friendships in the last few years that have definitely made me rethink things.  

I had a friend a few years ago that I felt an instant bond with, despite a pretty big age difference.  For several months, it was great.  We spent tons of time together and we got along wonderfully.  But the minute our husbands deployed, it went south, and fast.  I was working from home full-time, had 4 kids, and my health suddenly went haywire.  And that is where the differences really became obvious.  She was self-admittedly used to being the center of attention, young, no kids, no job, no responsibilities outside of her home and the things that go with that.  She couldn't relate to the fact that I was doing all that I was doing and that it took time.  She couldn't relate to the fact that spontaneity isn't that easy when you have a full-time job and 4 kids.  She had a hard time dealing with deployment and separation, being a new military wife, and I can't count the number of times I did drop everything when she needed me.  It was a very weird dynamic and one I didn’t get.  She always has said, then and now, that I was always there for her, no matter what, whenever she needed me.  But I couldn’t always drop everything for things like lunch or a movie or a trip to the mall.  Most of the time, when friendships fail, it is because one person isn’t there for the bad times.  I was.  Always.  But she didn’t want to be alone ever, and, even if I wanted to be, I couldn’t be there 24/7.  

It quickly became obvious that it had become a very one-sided relationship.  

I gave, she took.  It was never enough.  But when I needed a shoulder, there wasn’t one.  That hurt, but I dealt with it for a very long time, trying to be patient with the fact that she was new to military way of life and separation.  Until I got a vicious, and hateful, email that changed everything and broke my heart.  It hurt me because, for once, I really knew that I was not at fault for the situation.  There are very few times in life when a person can know that they are entirely blameless, but this was one of those times.  We didn't speak for months, and even when we did, it was never the same.  I lost trust, in an irrevocable way that has carried on with other friendships.  It didn't help that eventually it went back to the one-sided mess that it once was.  It became the kind of friendship where she never spoke to me... until she needed something.

I have another "friendship" like that, with a girl I was once so close to that we were practically sisters.  I moved away after awhile, and we fell out of the closeness we once had.  Several years past, and we both lived different lives.  When I came back to the local area 8 years ago, I had hope that we would be back to our old friendship, but it never happened.  That's okay; it happens.  But it quickly became obvious that what little contact we continue to have is solely based on what is happening in her life and what she needed.  I was nothing more than a resource to her.  That hurt.  And over the course of the years back in the local area, I found out that I had been deeply betrayed by her.  It happened a long time ago, and the situation no longer matters, but the principle of the matter does.

A couple years ago, I met a girl and, at first, it seemed like we had a ton in common.  But boundaries were not respected and I got stifled FAST.  Once again, my every waking moment was supposed to be spent with her.  And if I spent time with anyone else, including friends she didn't even know or my family, I was expected to either include her or not go, even things I did with my extended family.  Everything I did was supposed to be with her.  Everything I did, she had to do.  There is nothing that will stifle inspiration and creativity like someone who has to copy your every move.  I crave uniqueness and self-expression, and when she became a carbon copy of me, I lost every ounce of the soulful love of creativity I used to treasure.  It got to the point that I felt like I had no space of my own to be me, no privacy.  And it was absolutely horrific, trying to distance myself a little.  Drama, confrontations, and hatefulness beyond that which was reasonable.  A nightmare.

All of these things haven’t really helped my motivation to let people in.  At all.  It seems like, with a few exceptions, I get burned more than anything else in friendships.  For a long time, I fled to my "Kim Cave".  I couldn't take the drama anymore, the hate, the unnecessary cruelty.  I couldn’t stand feeling that I was nothing to anyone.  I hated how I felt about myself, as if I had no value beyond what I could do for someone.  I backed off from everyone.  I was lonely, but too gun-shy to come out because I couldn’t take anymore drama.  

Boundaries are needed but they can be so hard to put in place.  It has been a rough experience, trying to put them where they need to be.  One thing I have learned is that setting the boundaries is something you have to do, and you have to maintain them.  No matter what because if you don’t, you will only hurt yourself.  I also learned that, sadly, there are always going to be those people who don’t respect them or you for having them.  Accusations can follow, demeaning you for setting those boundaries.  Very often those same people have zero concept of the fact that they are the very ones that are crossing those boundaries.  But you still have the right to love yourself enough to keep the lines in place.  I have learned the hard way that sometimes you have to give yourself permission to cut the ties of friendship in order to find your own soul free and light again.  That has been a hard lesson to learn, but a valuable one.

I'm a SAHM to 4 boys, an aspiring author, a full-time student, a wife to an active duty Army soldier, and an Army vet. I am a mom, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend. I am slowly realizing that all of these things make up parts of who I am but aren't ALL that I am. I am also on a quest to change my life and how I fit into it. And I am enjoying it more than I ever thought I could!

Multifaceted Mama (my blog): http://multifacetedmama.com/Journal/
My facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KimIngramDeister
My main site: http://multifacetedmama.com

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Very Inspiring Blogger Award

If you've been hanging around the internet lately then you've probably noticed the Very Inspiring Blogger Award has been going around and some of my fellow bloggers have been kind enough to nominate me! Pip Miller, Magically Positive, The Red Box Company, Candace N'Diaye, and Avalon Blessings. (If you nominated me and I forgot you, lemme know)

I love that we can nominate each other and share the love and give each other a pat on the back and a big hug.

Here are the rules:

1. Display the award logo on your blog,
2. Link back to the person who nominated you,
3. State 7 things about yourself,
4. Nominate 15 other bloggers for this award and link to them,
5. Notify those bloggers of the nomination and the award's requirements.

Seven Things About Me

Wow, coming up with stuff you guys don't already know is a pretty hard task. I shall try!

1. My anxiety was so bad when I was younger that I begged my mom to homeschool me for 10th grade. She did and it was awesome. It turned into one of the most spiritual years of my life. I found the Goddess that year.

2. I love making gigantic wall collages by cutting out pictures from calendars and then sticking them to the wall. I have a collage of Magical Gardens made from the pictures of two calendars on my living room wall.

3. I am scared of learning how to drive. I've only tried once or twice and it wasn't very fun. 

4. I have five tattoos. Six stars on top of each shoulder, a moon on the right side of my chest, a sun on the left, and Brian Froud style Goblin on my left leg and a flowering vine on my right foot that wraps up my leg. 

5. I love watching tv. I have a ton of favorite shows including Big Brother UK. I also enjoy Pretty Little Liars, Common Law, Lost (shall go down in history as the best show ever), The Big Bang Theory and Newsroom are just a few.

6. I love zombie movies, end of the world movies, and post apocalyptic movies.

7.  The movie Babe makes me cry like a baby. And so did Gran Torino, now that I mention it, a lot of movies make me cry...

My Nominations

Now I read a ton of blogs! I think I have about 50 on my google reader so it's so hard to pick just fifteen! I'm going to try to share ones that I haven't noticed have been nominated!

Loran's Heart

Subtle Harmony

Soul Speak

Karina's Inner Space

Spirit Moves Dance

Crystal Clarity Copywriting

Dreamlife Wellness

The Hag's Den

Musings of Magick

Inspired Mind Body Soul

Ahamsa

Drya's Dream Art

Roots of She

StarSteps

Connection Revolution

Well there you go! Definitely check out these amazing people and show 'em some love!

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Happy birthday to me again!

So I was a'thinkin'...

About how my life has changed since last year. Last year I was so focused on silence, softness, and sweetness. I wanted to be this angel, I wanted to be so many things.

It was a time of exploring all of that. Trying on different mantles, seeing which ones fit me, casting aside the ones that didn't. I was trying to find my true self, hidden underneath layers of what I should-be, want-to-be, need-to-be, wish-I-was.

I learned a lot about myself.

I'm never going to be that person that I wanted to be but I am much better than the person that I thought I was and right now I am exactly who I was meant to be. I have come into my own. I know who I am. I am confident in who I am.

Sometimes I don't think there's any greater joy than that.

I've met some amazing people along the way. People I consider friends, people that I can talk to and confide in and ask the big questions that I don't know the answers to. I have people to guide me, to hold my hand, who "get" exactly who I am, and who allow me to be the same for them.

Thank you for coming along for the ride. Thank you for doing what you do, thank you for being you. As a birthday celebration, and because I love getting monies for my birthday, all of my e-books are 50% off for today only. You can get all four of them in a bundle for only $34, that's $8.50 per book instead of $20 so it's an awesome deal so snatch it up while you can and share with ze peoples of ze wooooorld. Blessing Manifesting world domination 2012!

I want to leave you with a song that I listened to at midnight last night. It was the song that inspired me to create Blessing Manifesting. It is the song that sings to my heart, tugs at my soul, and makes my world shine a little brighter.

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How to Accept Your Body Even When You Don't

Hey there pretty thang!

So lately I've been working on my latest project, Inner Journeys, which are half e-course/ half self-love coaching. Each one has a theme and a few days ago I was working on the Beautiful Body Acceptance Journey, coming up with prompts and homework and general love-yourself-inspiration.

Then I had a thought, "I wonder how much I weigh?"

I've talked about my weight and how I've had struggles with accepting me. I went from being over 200lbs to being 130lbs and I was able to stay there for awhile and then I let something terrible happen. I let other people get into my head.

When you lose so much weight it can change your relationships with the people around you. When you've been the "fat kid" all of your life and suddenly you aren't, people look at you differently. I had people making jokes at my expense, offering to buy me food, telling me I was anorexic, literally asking me what I was eating to make sure I was, telling me my face looked so skinny. Keep in mind I'm 5'1 and was at 130lb. I was wearing size 8-10 jeans. I was not emaciated, or unhealthy, or scary looking. I was healthy, but I let other people get into my head and I believed I looked better when I was heavier.

So I stopped caring what I ate and I stopped caring if I exercised.

I gained weight and shocker of shockers, I started getting compliments. "Your face is filling out again, you look normal. You're looking so much better, being that skinny just didn't fit you." One of the people that frequently picked at my weight when I was smaller walked by once and put her hand on my shoulder with an "I'm so glad you're getting healthier."

I swear I have weird people in my life. In the end I just stopped caring because my body is just one aspect of myself. I had this eat and be merry and people will leave you the hell alone - attitude. It worked, the comments stopped and I was content, except for the fact that my pants weren't fitting, but eh, they're just pants, I can get new ones right?

Fast forward to the other day. I was working on the Body Acceptance thing and decided that I ought to pull out the scale, after a good six months, and see how much I weighed. I've gained 26lbs and then I had a girly freak-out. I had this moment of "Oh my God I am so disgusting and fat." Bad inner self talk. Badbadbad.

Thankfully after a few minutes of sliding down that Mountain o' Suck, my inner-self, wise woman that she is, grabbed me by the britches and stopped me in my tracks. This is what she said.

Your body is only a small part of who you are.
True dat! I mean, I'm Domi-freakin'-nee, look at what I do. I make miracles, I change lives, I have this huge purpose. Why does a number on the scale matter so much? It doesn't, I mean it matters, because it is my health, but it doesn't matter enough to start berating myself and tearing down my self esteem. I'm not disgusting, not even a little bit.

If you don't like your body, change it.
I realized that I've been avoiding thinking about where I am happy at with my body and what makes me feel good. It was easier to ignore what I wanted and just go with the flow. In truth, I am perfectly capable of eating better and rekindling my love for jogging or yoga or aerobics. You know the saying "No used crying over spilled milk?" That's because you take a paper towel, mop it up, and voila, life is great. Getting back to where I was takes more energy and commitment, but it's remedied and fixable. I just need the motivation to start, and keep with it, and that brings me to point number three.

Someone else's opinion about your body is always irrelevant. ALWAYS.
We're not talking about the color of drapes, or the positioning of a couch. We're talking about my body, my body that allows me to do the wonderful things that I do on a daily basis. I would not let someone tell me what I should do with my life so why allow them to influence what I do with my body?

What I learned from this little freak out is that I do love and accept my body, just how it is, what I don't accept is the fact that I let other people influence how I treated it, that I disappointed myself in unraveling the work that I'd done to get healthier. This journey is SO about me and not about anyone else.

True story.

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Pssst... Secret....

I love sharing notes of love with you and with everyone else as well! Please pay it forward and send this to those that you feel need to hear it. Spread the love! Let the ones that you care about know how much they are loved and appreciated!

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Sacred Journey Through Journaling

My Sacred Journey Through Journaling has been one of the most popular things that I've ever released. I have been so touched and blown away by the support and the response. In truth I expected 20ish people would be interested and in the end I had to upgrade my mailing list.

I have an invitation for you.

I would love for you to guest post for me using one of the prompts. A few weeks ago my dear friend Elisa at MagicallyPositive.com sent me her prompt which I posted right here. It was just so beautiful to hear her story and I would love to hear yours too! I would love to share your words and your wisdom with the readers, I would love for you to see that other women relate to you and understand the struggles you've gone through. You can use the comment form on the "About Me" page or you can e-mail me at Dominee@BlessingManifesting.com

Sacred Journey Through Journaling
So in case you haven't heard all about it, here's some information about the mini e-course and if you haven't signed up yet, I truly hope that you will!

Want two whole weeks of fabulous journaling prompts delivered straight to your inbox? Sign up for this FREE Sacred Journey Through Journaling! Every day for two weeks you'll get a juicy journaling prompt that will inspire you and make you think about yourself and your self care practices.

Deepen your writing practice!

If you have a blog, handwritten journal, morning pages, or you just love writing but you need a little inspiration on what to write about, this is for you! Not only do you get writing prompts, but I also include inspirational quotes on writing as well. It's truly yummy!

So please sign up, send me the answers to your prompts, share with your friends, and spread the word!

It would thrill me to no end to reach 500 subscribers. I can't think of anything more awesome than that. 

It'll make me do a happy dance in my underwear. No joke.

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A Bad Case of the Grumps

So hey there!
The last few weeks have been a rollercoaster of suck and un-suck. Just when I thought I'd gotten over it something else popped up and made me miserable.

I was suffering from Post-Project-Blues and that was just the start of the avalanche of OMGMYLIFESUCKS.

One of my favorite people at my pays-the-bills job quit without letting me know and aside from that making my job a million times harder than it had to be, I was really close to him and I got very heart-hurt over the fact that he just left. It triggered all of my abandonment issues, which brought up all sorts of gunk.

The gunk leaked over into my business and I spent a day being very resentful, feeling like everything I do sucks and wondering why I put in so much time into my business when no one really cares. You know the spiral. I think we all have days like that. And then I started feeling suuuuper alone and lonely. I just wanted to throw up my hands and wail "Why meeee?!"

The other day I was exhausted and frustrated when I got off work, my feet hurt, my back hurt, I was short-tempered, and annoyed and I really didn't want to be. Those emotions had run their course and they were no longer needed. Feeling that way wasn't helping me do anything but feel sorry for myself, which is fine, I'm good with wallowing, you just can't do it for too long. At some point you've got to decide that it's time to feel something different. Being grumpy helps shine light on stuff you need to deal with but once the grumps have done their job, you gotta move on. You gotta take time for you.

Even I forget to love myself sometimes.

The last few days were full of self care. I took a little break from business-stuff. And then I had a nice little ritual of Self Care to chase away the grumps,

I took a nice, hot, candle-lit, bath full of wonderful lavender and I just allowed myself to soak and relax and it was wonderful. I took extra care washing my hair. I am very proud of my long curly hair and it was so soothing to have it thoroughly washed and paid attention to instead of the usual wash-and-condition-as-quickly-as-possible. I felt like I was being pampered. It was lovely. I then laid down in bed and listened to music while just letting myself be and feel. Afterwards I felt renewed and rejuvinated and more myself and it was pretty flippin' fantastic.

See ya latter Grumps.

What is your Self Care ritual when you've got a bad case of the grumps? If you don't have one, what are some things you can do the next time you are feeling down?

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Come sit with me for tea and cookies

Hi there beautiful one,

Come and sit with me for awhile, I will pour you tea and feed you cookies. I like simple chocolate chip, warm, and soft, and gooey, those are the best.

This is our Sacred Journey day, the day when we really get to talk and share our stories. Deep deep sharing, I'd love to hear whatever is on your mind. I'd love to get to know you.

I realized something the other day, I'm not overly social with you guys. I have a pretty decent presence on Facebook and Twitter, I post about four times a day, consistently and you guys seem to like that and I appreciate the love. What I don't share is anything  relating to me. I rarely make it personal and I realized that I'm not sure I like that. I want to be personal, I am personal. I want to make friends with you and I realized why I stop myself. You scare me. *Nods* Yep, you heard me, I'm scared of you. You frighten me.

Up until a year and a half ago I was terrible at making friends.

I still am up to a point. I'm always afraid that I'm not enough of a friend, I don't reach out enough, I don't make enough time for them, I don't have enough to talk about, I'm just not enough. I spend so much time stressing out about what I'm not and being overwhelmed with what I feel is expected of me, that eventually the friendship just kinda fades away because I don't know how to deal with that overwhelmed feeling. But I am trying, I really am, and that's all I can do. So let's be friends! I'd love to chat with you on Facebook and Twitter and here in the comments so you don't be shy and I won't be shy!

I had an idea and I'd love your input if you'd be sweet enough to give it. I've been thinking about my coaching sessions and I really want to completely change them, so I am going to! The new Sacred Spirit Sessions are going to be completely different and I'm so excited to tell you about them! First off there will be two packages: 7 Day Package and then a 21 Day Package. There will be several themes to choose from: Business Bliss, Heartbreak to Happiness, Sustainable Self Love, Losing Loneliness, Creating Creativity, Beautiful Body Acceptance, and Abandoning Anxiety. (I totes love alliteration, I CAN'T HELP IT)

So say you want the 7 Day: Sustainable Self Love, when you purchase it you'll be sent a questionnaire to fill out about your Self Love Challenges and what you want help with. I will create seven days worth of yumminess to help you overcome your challenges and it'll be sent right to your inbox each day for a week. Each day you'll get a journaling prompt, a homework assignment, an affirmation, thought for the day, crystal/aromatherapy tips, the Emotional Awareness Workbook, relevant links to my past blog posts for you to read and soak up, and a special message from me. At the end of the seven days I'll send you an email asking you how it went and I will correspond back with you to make sure that you're creating a nourishing routine.

So what do ya think?

Is that something you'd be interested in? Is there something you think I should add that would make it more worthwhile? What would you pay for something like that? I'd really love (and sooooo much appreciate) any thoughts or advice that you have!

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Aloha Healing and Island Magic

Good morning my sweet friends!

Things are really starting to look up again, last week was hard but I rode it though, lots of lounging on the couch, quiet time, time spent with my bestie, time spent in my bed, oh it was lovely.

My muse, wonderful spirit that she is, wasn't too happy. "Dear Dominee, wouldn't it be great if you got this finished? Sweet Dominee, look at your to-do list... it's growing. Dominee, you really should get that done. Oooh, Domineeeeeeeee, I have a wonderful new project for you, go do it now..." To which I firmly and sweetly replied:

"Hush. I'm watching a movie."

I didn't allow myself to feel bad for taking time off for me. Of course I love my business but I have to love myself as well. Take care of myself and my business prospers in the end. That's my little secret. (Free business advice from me. Hm, I really love how I run my business, I should talk about that more shouldn't I?)

Anywhoo that all brings us to this week's card from the Oracle of Shadows and Light by Lucy Cavendish. The card that I picked this week is Amara the Menehune who represents Aloha Healing.

Amara appears to tell you to slow down and enjoy life fully. 

Amara represents all of the things that come to mind when you think of Hawaii. She is warm and sensual and sweet. She is laughter, dolphins, tropical breezes, and sweet fruits. Amara reminds us not to rush but to slow down and take the time to be fully present in everything that we are doing. Amara reminds you to connect deeply, work passionately, relax fully, sleep soundly, laugh loudly... put yourself completely in the moment of everything that you are doing.

This is a time to let go of guilt. Invite the energy of Hawaii into your life. Allow yourself to make the time to do the things that nurture you. Stop feeling like you always have to be rushing or busy, stop believing that feeling stressed out is a good thing because it means you're being active. Go outside and let the sun shine on you and relax.

When you're busy do you struggle with being fully present in all of your feelings? Do you ever find yourself brushing aside happiness and enjoyment in the quest to get things done? What is your favorite way to relax?

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